Why?

You know I always ask myself, why me out of all people? Why not others? Why not my friends? Why me?
Is it because I’ve been weak that I just allowed my body to be taken over by that voice I hear everyday? Or is it mainly because I just want to be perfect? I don’t know the real answer. Really no one can actually pin point what their real reason in having this disorder.
So day before yesterday I weighed myself when I’m not allowed to touch the scale. I couldn’t help it though. It was like it was mocking me. I stepped on the scale, I swear I was already planning how to hurt myself in order to get rid of that awful feeling I would have if I had gained weight. Except…. I didn’t gain weight……. instead I lost weight. Now you must thinking I should feel rather stressed out here. No. I’m actually happy. Over joyed and excited.
See. Steve is a good friend. He never breaks his promises.
Bananixox

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